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The writings of a former wine mom and sometime supermom maintaining weight loss, workouts, and wits. Proudly alcohol-free since July 5, 2018.

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Hi, I’m Jen.

An occasional supermom of two aspiring superheroes, I have been known to polish off a jar of Nutella and/or a bottle of wine in one sitting.

But after six years of motherhood under my too-tight belt, I decided to cut the Nutella habit and invest in self-care. In 2017, I lost 25 pounds with Weight Watchers (now WW) and started exercising regularly again. In 2018, I maintained my weight loss, ramped up my workouts, and began to explore my dysfunctional relationship with wine.

Having completed Dry January and then another 76-day alcohol-free stint in the spring, I committed to One Year Alcohol-Free on July 5, 2018. July 4, 2019 was my Independence Day and I’m proud to be navigating #momlife without booze.

Find me on Instagram! @maintaining_mama

Over the last couple of days I have been working on a list of sobriety resources for the Peloton Sober Squad. Rounding up so many sources of inspiration reminded me that when I began my AF journey, committing to Dry January 2018, I had no idea most of this existed because I never would have thought to look for it. The first alcohol-related book I ordered was #ThisNakedMind - and I ordered it on my Kindle so that my husband wouldn’t see me reading it. But I soon realized that I needed to highlight like crazy, so I tentatively ordered it in paperback. That book now sits proudly on my “quit lit” shelf with over a dozen other books, most of which I have read over the last year-and-three-quarters. Soon podcasts replaced music on dog walks. I inundated myself with the musings of wise, sober women (and a couple of dudes) who inspired me to keep going, to believe in myself and in a better life. Once I became more comfortable being open with the fact that I was working to change my drinking habit, I dove into the sober Instagram world and clicked “Follow” with wild abandon. And then I discovered that it’s easy to become totally inundated with inspo. So, particularly if you are at the start of your own AF journey, pace yourself. There were times when I needed to take a break from podcasts, read some chick lit instead of quit lit, and unfollow a few Instas that weren’t serving me. No book, podcast, or Instagram should make you feel less than. Arm yourself with a library of mentors, a digital queue of helpers, and a feed of would-be BFFs. Be selective in what you buy and who you follow. Don’t feel bad if someone who has over 40K followers is not your people (it took me too long to learn this). Gather all the information and inspiration you can, but make sure it’s boosting you and not weighing you down. Let these resources be a tool, not a burden. Go getcha some inspo! 📚📱 #soberoctoberreflections #AFday469 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober #pelotonsobersquad #afsquad

I woke up to this beauty this morning 🌄 Well, technically I woke up to pitch black. The sunrise emerged as I sipped my coffee and read my book in my quiet house with everyone still asleep. I could dwell on all the sunrises I missed, or all the books I could have read by now, if only I freed myself from the bonds of booze sooner. But I don’t dwell, because I am too busy gawking at gorgeous sunrises and reading good books and staying present in my #AFlife. I gave up regretting my #winemom days awhile ago. Because I realize getting through those days got me here. And I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. #AFday469 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober #pelotonsobersquad #afsquad

Sleep then: My head is spinning as it hits the pillow and I fall asleep (let’s call a spade a spade: pass out) fast. Around 3am, like clockwork, I wake in a sweat, my pajamas soaked, my heart pounding, my mouth dry and sour. I guzzle water and try to fall back asleep. Sometimes I can, sometimes I can’t. But either way I am woken up at 6:45am by one of my kids crawling into bed with me. I feel as bad emotionally as I feel physically. Shame, disgust, fear, guilt. This didn’t happen every night. But it happened enough. Enough for me to realize I needed to make a change. Sleep now: My head is clear as it hits the pillow and I fall asleep fast. Sometimes a kid or a dog wakes me in the middle of the night. Otherwise I sleep like a rock until my alarm goes off at 5:45am so I can start my day with stretching or yoga, then coffee and a book. I wake up feeling ready for the day ahead and appreciative of my morning time which I have been able to carve out because my body is no longer sleeping off booze from the night before. I don’t always get enough sleep, and the kids and dogs are often in cahoots, taking turns waking up in the middle of the night for several nights in a row. If I’m home alone or otherwise antsy, I stay up too late so I can conk out quickly. Only now I read, instead of drink, until I can’t keep my eyes open. AF sleep, like AF life itself, is not perfect. But it is so, so much better. SO much better. Seriously. Sleep rules 😴 #soberoctoberreflections #AFday468 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober #pelotonsobersquad #afsquad

Back in action (sorta). Back on track (kinda). Good enough, considering today was a mash-up of me mode (kickboxing, Peloton, volunteer work) and mommy mode (playground, play date, jiujitsu). My brain is spinning but I managed to tick off some goals. Just have to keep moving in this direction! 🆙 #AFday468 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober #pelotonsobersquad #afsquad

Today is one of those days that just hasn’t been as enjoyable as it could have been. As the sun shone on this beautiful fall holiday, my family was mired in sour moods and too much traffic driving home from our farmhouse, which we were all bummed to leave. I meant to do yoga and strength training. I meant to eat clean. But I didn’t do these things, and I didn’t hydrate enough, and I feel gross. But here’s another thing I didn’t do: I did not drink alcohol. On a great day, I might not even think about not drinking because there are too many other things about which to feel good. But on a sub-par day like this one, I turn to this accomplishment. Not drinking is a gold star that’s always in my back pocket. I can pull it out any time I need a boost. It’s a reminder that even a crappy day is better without alcohol. Alcohol only ever made the crappy days worse. #AFday467 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober #pelotonsobersquad #afsquad

Sad to leave this beautiful place after a weekend that went by too fast! But it’s time to slug back some water and put the weekend’s carbs and cranky moods behind me, remember the gorgeous foliage, warm snuggles, and rejuvenating nature walks, and gear up to get back on track this week. I’ve got my 350th Peloton ride on Wednesday and a very special spin in a studio in MA being taught by my BFF on my birthday on Saturday! Plus I’m teaching two kickboxing classes. So I have a lot to look forward to this week and I will need healthy food and hydration to get me through it. Here’s to honoring the good, ditching the bad, and moving forward with positivity. I am doing my best! 💪 #AFday467 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober #pelotonsobersquad #AFsquad

@clare_pooley is one of my favorite authors on my “quit lit” shelf. Her memoir, #TheSoberDiaries, is chock full of candor and humor and one-liner gems such as this one. Cheers to that! 👏👏#soberoctoberreflections #AFday466 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober

On a dirt road in New Hampshire, we had a full but low-key day typical of our life here. Lots of outside exploration, a nature walk, games, and s’mores by the fire pit as I racked up my 466th day of alcohol freedom. Meanwhile, on Facebook, the #PelotonSoberSquad added another 100+ members and a new, inclusive, judgment-free community takes shape to support any rider who chooses to question his or her relationship with alcohol. And in a cycling studio in New York, @allymisslove led a #Peloton ride that grappled with the virtue of temperance. About 20 minutes into the ride, she gave a shout-out to the #AFsquad. Her acknowledgment of our group - especially during a ride about temperance - means so much to so many of us and put a big ol’ dent in the stigma associated with acknowledging a struggle with alcohol. I am grateful for so much today. My precious family, our happy place; my friend @by.grit.and.grace who asked me to partner with her on starting the #AFsquad; and Ally, who chose to acknowledge and support us and what very well might just be turning into a movement 👊💜 #AFday466 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober

When Annie Grace (@thisnakedmind) first told me on Day 11 of #TheAlcoholExperiment that I needed to write a letter to my body, I thought, “EW! WHY?!” And then I thought, “Oh. That reaction answers my question, doesn’t it?” Further along in TAE I also wrote letters to my past and future selves. Each of these exercises was extremely powerful for me. By writing to my body and myself as I would write to a friend, I had to think of my body and myself as a friend - which made me realize how I had been at war with myself in so many ways for so long. Wishing to be thin, but scarfing Swedish Fish by the fistful. Wishing to cut down on drinking, but heading for the wine fridge night after night. Through these letters, I found forgiveness. I found grace. I found appreciation. I made peace with my mom bod and my wine mom life, and paved the way for a brighter future than I ever thought possible 🌟 #soberoctoberreflections #AFday465 #soberaf #jomo #ichoosenobooze #winemom #sahm #mom #momlife #momblogger #instamom #wwmoms #healthy #alcoholfree #sober #soberlife #grayareadrinking #sobermovement #sobermom #sobermommovement #soberoctober #bossoctober

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My Drinking Non-Negotiables

I will not drink to relieve boredom.
I will not drink to relieve stress.
I will not be drunk in front of my children.
I will not drink when I am alone; or alone with my children during the witching hour or any hour.
I will not drink when I have to drive.
I will not drink when I am traveling alone.
I will always put my children, my husband and my safety before alcohol.

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